A Cry Can Feel Good

Sometimes you just need to let out a cry. One of those deep, sobbing, flush your heart of pain kind of cries. During the cry- it sucks. Emotions are suddenly overwhelming every sense in your body.

Afterwards, you feel good- almost empty. And no one hates you for doing it. No one judges you for letting the pain get expelled. We all go through it. Sometimes there is no clear reason as to why the tears kick in. But it happens.

Fighting back the tears doesn’t help. Doing that can make the feelings worse. And sharing why you hurt isn’t always easy. But take solace in knowing you are not alone, even if it feels like it.

Whether you know me personally or through this crazy cyberspace world. I have bad days and need to share sometimes. I also have good days that I keep to myself.

We’re in this together.

Are You Pondering What I’m Pondering?

Again, I was stuck trying to write my blog tonight. I was thinking to myself, “It’s the same thing I do every day…why can’t I just come up with something to write?” That’s when it hit me- Pinky and the Brain are so funny.

They try and take over the world every night. But it was never the plans that amused me. It was the crazy off putting comments that Pinky would blurt out as an answer to the nightly question: “Are you pondering what I’m pondering?”

I just took a break from writing this so I could watch nearly 7 minutes of responses. I seriously snorted a couple of times. If you loved Pinky and The Brain- check out Are you pondering what I’m pondering? Most are ridiculous (and dated jokes) but some were cuckoo crazy.

Even though I didn’t take over the world tonight, I enjoyed the silly hijinks of two lab mice once more.

Hudsucker Proxy

Sometimes in my blog I like to share films that I enjoy. I don’t do any write ups or dissection of the films. Just that I enjoy them and why. Today I am writing about a favorite of mine that I really enjoy watching in the winter. That’s because most of the film is set around New Year’s and the idea of new beginnings.

The Hudsucker Proxy is set in the early 20th century. It has some of the best cinematography I’ve ever enjoyed. The sets are Art Deco, the timeline is flawless, the jokes are quick and perfectly timed. What’s not to love about the film?

The simplicity of the underlying story and the characters that drive the film make it relatable and a joy to be a part of. I enjoyed the film so much, I made a Cosplay of the lead character a few years back. It was such an obscure costume, that when I wore it to three different comic conventions- maybe ten people understood it.

If you haven’t seen the film, please check it out this season. It is a great movie by the Coen Brothers. Check out one of my favorite scenes on YouTube: Hula Hoop.

Mushrooming

My wife mentioned how some of her coworkers go out and collect wild mushrooms in autumn. Today was a perfect day for me to explore our yard for such fungi.

I downloaded an app that allows me to take a photo and it would tell me if it was toxic or safe to eat. I downloaded “Picture Mushroom” and it has a free trial for the week, but costs $29 for the year. So why not try it out since this was my first foray into mushrooming. And I don’t think I will be out in much more of the world to search for ‘shrooms, so after this week, I’ll likely delete the app. (If anyone has an app they enjoy using- please let me know).

The afternoon turned into a fun hunt for my wife and I. We gently collected a variety of mushrooms, keeping them separated so that we could cross-check afterwards just in case. We don’t want a sick family because of a lack of knowledge.

Turns out that we had quite the collection of various mushrooms growing on our property that were good for consumption! My wife and our oldest daughter went to work cleaning the funguses and we stored them away in paper bags until tomorrow night’s dinner.

In our front yard, we also happened to find a smattering of toxic mushrooms. The kind that cause hallucinations. We collected them up and told our teens about them and the effects. Ingesting these types of mushrooms is not on our radar at this time. But we removed them from the yard anyways.

Do you go mushroom hunting? Any good recipes to share? Or perhaps any ill effects happened?

Let me know in the comments. (And no, we are not selling the psychedelic ones!)

Bruno Fenger

Today I was going through old papers- such as bills, taxes, etc… and disposing of the unnecessary ones. I found old paystubs from Chuck E. Cheese, a copy my father’s probate (with an address for My Unknown Half Sister) and information about our current home. The last one is what today’s blog is about.

You see, my father-in-law designed and built this house back in the 1970’s. Bruno Fenger was a brick layer by trade and the workmanship in this house is amazing. He also enjoyed woodworking as a hobby, often selling at various craft shows back in the 80’s/90’s. He is a very talented man who immigrated from Germany many, many decades ago. He decided to build a house and stay in British Columbia to raise his family.

I found rolls of papers from when he designed this house and had purchased the property. The blueprints were all hand drawn. To me these pages showed a commitment to excellence that you probably won’t find in today’s market. It was also great to see how his designs translated into a finished product (such as the fireplace) and some of the changes which occurred during the building process.

As a tribute to his work, I framed the blueprint for the upstairs and hung it on the wall. Bruno’s work lives on in this home through more than just ideas on paper. With his 88th birthday coming up at the end of November, I thought it to be fitting that I show some gratitude to the man who made a home for my family.

Thank you Bruno for creating such an amazing house for your grandchildren to grow up in. We wouldn’t have it any other way.

What Day Is Quarantine Day?

I know that it’s Thursday. I just don’t know what the date is anymore. The world is so confusing right now. It’s probably going to get even worse soon.

We are about to embark on another round of quarantine. This is no time to get lax and visit with people outside of your bubble. My family has been lucky and we have remained healthy. All of us do our part- wearing masks, limiting contact with others, washing hands, sanitizing- all of it. So far it’s been good.

The world is getting worse. So take care people. Keep your bubbles small. And if your sick- stay in solitude. It will help.

Elementary Alternative

Our daughter has been driving our 2003 Honda Element on her own since August 2019 when she got her N. She may not have always sounded happy that she got to drive the car because it wasn’t newer like mine or her mother’s. But she still calls it “her car”.

Recently she mentioned that the Check Engine Light came on. Naturally we asked when she needed her next oil change. She was unsure because she didn’t ever watch her mileage. Turns out she was within a few hundred kilometers of needing it done. So she planned on going in sometime soon. No big deal.

The other day however, her Battery Light came on. That was interesting since we had bought a brand new battery days before she got her N. Turns out that today the car just would not start. My wife drive out to where she was and gave her a “jump”. As our daughter arrived at home, the car died and she coasted into the driveway. Seems like the alternator is shot.

After looking online, it appears to be a nuisance to get this replaced, although rather simple. So now I have to decide if I want to attempt it on my own, or pay someone else to do it for me. I’m leaning towards getting somebody else to do it. Mostly because it’s cold and wet outside and we do not have a heated garage. If it was summer- I’d sure give it the ol’ college try.

So all things considered, it’s only may that this added expense would happen right before Christmas, and right after we have spent a butt-ton of money on gifts. Le Sigh. It needs to get done. Oh well. Time to call a mechanic.

Life Day

If there’s something that you need to know about me, it’s that I enjoy Star Wars tremendously. Let’s be realistic here, you all know I love STAR WARS. I mean honestly, I have numerous blog posts that are related to Star Wars in some way. Today is no different.

A few years ago I showed my children the classic in bad Crossover ideas ever. The Star Wars Holiday Special. The show is severely cringeworthy attempting to watch it. It’s so bad that my kids literally don’t remember watching it with me. But as a fan, I had to view it. I even grew up on those Star Wars made-for-tv-movies: Ewok Caravan of Courage and Ewok Battle for Endor.

Tonight, Disney+ and LEGO have released a Lego Version of the Holiday Special. I am overcome with joy and cannot wait to view it numerous times! I have been excited for months about this show.

Why?

Because LEGO somehow manages to make their stories based on movies or characters campy and fun while still holding true to the original content. So if you have kids- watch some of those LEGO shows with them. They are a ton of fun.

Tonight I shall wish you all an early “Happy Life Day”.

Crisco

Two weeks ago I mentioned how it was getting close to choosing Music for November. Specifically Christmas music. I’m not going to lie, I’ve snuck in a couple playlists since then. Especially on Saturday when we pulled out the decorations.

I love playing music. Over the past few months I have enjoyed Spotify as it plays on all of my devices.

Last night as I was driving home, I wanted my iPhone to play some Christmas music. Only this time it wasn’t in my car or on my phone. My Spotify account was still connected to our home. So my music was being played for my family and not me.

They got to enjoy some Christmas Disco. Or as my daughter has decided to dub it, CRISCO. Probably my most favorite term this year now. And very fitting considering how much baking we do during the holidays as well.

From here on out, when I’m baking and listening to Christmas music- it’s only Crisco for the whole household!

Cleaning for Christmas Season

This past weekend we did a pretty good cleaning up of the downstairs of our home. My wife has been adamant over the years that we are not permitted to put out Winter Decorations until the house is cleaned up. I push every year to start the process in early November.

That’s because I love decorating our home for winter!

This year, my wife was a big part of the decorating process. In fact, the entire family was a huge help and we had fun doing it. Well, maybe not the cleaning aspect… but the decorating for sure! All that’s left is the trees to come out after my wife’s birthday… on December 6th.

Have you already started decorating for the winter solstice or other such celebrations?

Pre-Christmas Online Fulfillments

Holy smokes have we been hitting the online purchases a bit heavy this year. My wife and I were a bit skeptical about the gifts arriving on time for Christmas. So we ordered in advance with plenty of time to spare.

This is the “condensed” version of what we have received so far. Amazon ships far too many packages with one or two items inside. It’s good in a way because we know that we are getting 90% of our stuff in time for the holidays. There’s a couple items set to arrive by December 22nd still. Which feels crazy in a world where we came accustomed to instant gratification.

I can’t really complain because we always choose the “Free Shipping” option. Sometimes it’s the next day, other times it could take a couple of weeks. Plus Amazon is great when you need to return an item or the item does a “no-show”.

All I need to do now is keep the kids out of the boxes and “Archive” the purchases so they don’t “accidentally” see an item that has been ordered. We all know how sneaky kids can be when it comes to finding out their Christmas gifts. I know I was pretty bad at spoiling the surprises for myself when I was younger.

Are you done shopping? Have you even started? Any horror stories of online shopping? Still looking for that perfect gift for your family members? Let me know in the comments.

Creatively Growing Up

Last night my daughter Interviewed me for a school project. She took painstaking measures to create the perfect lighting and backdrop. I took her direction as best I could without asking too many questions. I also did not offer any advice or “butt in” in any way.

It was tough to be a parent and just let her do it on her own. Like the first time your child walks to school alone or rides a two wheel bike without you holding the seat. You want to hold their hand, but the pride you feel when they have accomplished something on their own is far more gratifying.

I’m not going to lie, it was challenging for me to let her be creative and run the show. It was her project and her vision. In the end, she got the footage she desired and is off to the editing portion within the next week or so. Maybe she will let me see the final product. I promised her I wouldn’t critic it. No idea if she believes me. But I believe in her.

Prepping For An Interview

Our oldest is currently in post secondary school studying media broadcasting and film making. One of her projects is an interview where the interviewee essentially monologues about something. Then she will show what they are talking about with some voice over work.

So she brought home her equipment as has decided to interview me. I get to talk about 3D Printing and how I got into it. As well she wants me to show how the machine works. Of course I jumped at the chance to help her out. And I get to talk about 3D printing- my latest hobby/obsession.

It’s not very often that my daughter wants me around. Naturally I am going to be there for her. Tomorrow I’ll continue to share about the experience. As it seems that for 3 minutes of footage it may take us all night to film. Right now she is setting up the lighting and camera. I expect to be sitting on the stool for an extended period.

Wish us luck for getting through this. I have to remember to step back and let her have full control. It is her project and her career path.

Tick Tock

Tick Tock

No not the app. But the numerous Clocks in my house. All ticking away noisily as I sit at my dining room table alone. No one is awake yet. Even the outdoors are calm today.

Listening to the clicks and tings of my home as it wakes up is eerie. The sound of the heat slowly kicking in and a half dozen clocks mark each passing moment. As if my home is one large clock with many tiny clocks inside. And I’m just a cog going ‘round.

All the while these sounds are filling my mind with the idea that I’m flittering my time away. Staring blankly at my phone as I scroll through my latest newsfeed. Passing time until the next moment.

Tick Tock goes the clock.

Coats

It’s getting into much cooler temperatures these days. So that means wearing heavier coats and jackets in order to stay warm. If you’re like my household, the jackets never end up where they belong after being used.

Usually the coats end up on the backs of chairs. Or tossed onto the couch. Of the six dining table chairs- my wife currently has jackets on two of them. This morning, I just walked in and tossed my jacket onto a chair in our front foyer.

I know what you’re thinking, “But Josef, why don’t you hang up your jackets?”

I really should do that. Especially since NO ONE KNOWS HOW TO CLOSE THE CLOSET DOORS. The closet we hang our jackets in is always open. You’d think that we would be able to grab a hanger, put the jacket away, and close the door again.

Nope. Five people in this household and the closet is always open and our jackets are keeping our chairs warm.

I should just get a coat rack and hang up a jacket on it that I won’t wear for two or three years. As well, on one of the other pegs will be a jacket from a visitor, only no one will ever claim it. That’s what a coat rack is for, amirite?

The worst part about my rant today? I’m going to leave the jackets where they are. I’m just as guilty and lazy as the rest of my family. And most likely you are as well. Let’s stand in solidarity as the jackets hang out on chairs!

Beautiful Starts And Ends

I was driving into work last night and just admired the look of the sky as the sun set. Scanning the horizon you could see yellow encircling the world and above- it would disappear into a rainbow of oranges and pinks. Finally fading off into a dark blue directly overhead.

This morning I came home to see the sun rising. A vivid pastel palette was now overtaking the world. Through the trees in my backyard I could see the winter chill approaching in the air.

I have always admired scenery. Especially as the colours in the sky change- offering a new view to our world. Which do you prefer? Sunrise or sunset?

Ahead of the Game

Yesterday I mentioned that I was looking for Christmas light clips in: Make it. That is because I’m trying to get ahead of the winter season. I like to put up my lights in early November, but I don’t turn them on until December. That’s because I don’t want to be freezing my fingertips or standing on the roof in the rain trying to put up lights.

I also sneak a couple of decorations out a bit early. Just because of the hassle of getting a ladder in the cold. We have four large baubles that hang from our ceiling in our main foyer. I hate putting them up every year, so I just git’r’done immediately after Halloween.

Since I am crafty, I also do something unique every year. This year is a couple of cheap wooden crates painted in red that will hold Christmas stuffed animals. We will put them underneath the stairs in our front foyer. I figured I better paint them now and let them dry 100% before putting anything inside. It also gives me a chance to decide if I want to add anything more to the boxes. Like a hand painted sign or fake holly. We shall see.

Are you getting ready for those winter holidays yet? Let me know in the comments. Plus I love to see what other people craft. It always brings me joy seeing stuff made from scratch. It always inspires me to do better.

If You Can’t Find It- Make It

For a couple of years I have been searching out a specific type of clip to hold my outdoor Christmas lights. I always remember to look for them when the season starts at the various stores. But I haven’t seen them in almost three decades. It was when we first moved in that I had used the few we had left over as well as a clip that was close in shape. That clip was far more flimsy, almost intentional so I would need to replace them more often.

The Christmas light clip a simple design. The wires go through the zigzag and hold in place. I like how sturdy these clips are. Unlike the other ones I picked up that have snapped over the years, leaving my lights dangling down. This design was one my father had picked up back in the 90’s.

Because I was unable to find the clips in the store or online, my wife suggested I 3D print them. Brilliant! I went on Thingiverse and someone had uploaded exactly what I needed! I was so happy! So many exclamation marks!!! But in order to make them sturdy, I couldn’t speed up the print. 33 minutes it takes to print one. I need close to twenty replacement pieces. Good thing Christmas is a few weeks away.

As I searched online for the clips, I was in the middle of printing off another great item that will make life easier. I also didn’t know I needed it until I saw it…

I printed a battery dispenser for all my loose “AA” batteries. It holds 12 batteries in the lower part, and has a separate extension to hold more. Now instead of searching the junk drawer the batteries will have a happy little home and I can see when we get low..

Having a 3D printer is fun and has become very versatile in my day to day use. I wonder what else I should print?

Last Minute Panic

It’s been a while since I’ve had a tough time writing. Usually I find something that happened and share the story. Sometimes a memory comes flooding in and I feel a strong desire to get the words out. But the past few weeks I e really struggled to keep up with my daily blogs.

What I write is generally for myself. I use my writing as a way of keeping calm and getting those anxiety feels away. I enjoy sharing in this community because 99% of the time people are kind with their comments.

Yes, I have written every single day since January 2016. The goal to write daily is a personal one. The deadline I gave myself is midnight every day. I do not want to skip a beat as I fear that it would make me susceptible to doing it again, and then again, until I finally just gave up.

I’m not ready to give up my writing. I just want you to know I’ve been having a tough time feeling creative. I am sorry about these late night posts. I generally like to have my stories out by breakfast. When the day has yet to take over, and the brain has had a good rest.

Hopefully I’ll be back on track again soon. Those of you who still follow-Bear with me. I’ll get better.

Let Them Grow Up

I have a tough time letting my kids grow up. But it’s a natural occurrence in humanity. Parents being parents trying to raise kids to be adults. And then not wanting the kids to become adults.

Today, our oldest aced her practical exam with the top mark in her class. She was beaming with pride. She texted my wife numerous times throughout the morning in regards to her success.

Watching my kids grow up, it makes me sad that I won’t have moments with them anymore. It’s hard to ask them to spend time with me without it seeming forced sometimes.

Letting the kids become their own person with a bit of guidance is all I can do. I have to let them grow up.

Be Patient With The Results

As the USA still has no clear winning President, it is important for everyone to be patient. This is truly an unique moment in history that the world is witnessing. It could be a huge shift in how elections are run in the future. Especially in this day and age of “instant gratification” that we have all become accustomed to.

So to my American neighbors- be patient. Every vote matters. Every vote needs to be counted. There will be a President announced.

And please stay civil if you don’t happen to like the end result. It’s only a few years- work towards change or appreciate the results if it fits your views.

Music For November

Halloween is over, so no more spooky music playing in my home. A few years ago I began playing Christmas Music at the start of November. This year my wife has asked me not to.

So what do I play in the mean time? Should I put on Guns N’ Roses “November Rain” on repeat? I have no problem playing that song for hours on end. Pretty sure my family would think it is some sort of torture by the fourth or fifth time it starts. I could always play Disco.

I’m not sure why, but my family despises my disco music. I’m always up for a bit of dancing around the house to some classic 70’s beats. “Disco is not dead! Disco is life!

Or I can just put on some calming Chamber music. I love classical music as an ambience for our home. Considering we do call it Castle Havelka.

I’ll still be sneaking some Christmas music in soon in hopes that the family doesn’t notice. Maybe Christmas Disco or Christmas Chamber Music…

BB-R2

I finally did it! I built an R2-D2 on my own. Sort of. I mean, it sure looks like an astromech droid. Only on a smaller scale. For ages, I wanted a 3D printer in order to build a life size R2-D2. But I needed to start smaller so as not to get discouraged.

I found a group on Facebook that creates droids for the 3D printers. They also offer plenty of advice for electronics, sound and lights to one another. You can join the group on Facebook and support the Patreon at Mr. Baddeley’s Printed Droid if you are interested.

I printed the parts over the past month in between all the other projects I had. My little droid was starting to come together.

Last week, I finished painting the droid. I used some acrylic paints that I had on hand. The metallic blue and silver completed the look and made it obvious that it is a droid. After my painstakingly careful paint job, I gave it a clear coat to seal the paint.

After weeks of waiting for parts off Amazon, I was finally able to assemble the droid over the weekend. I’m proud to say that my BB-R2 is completed. I added a remote control to it and he now moves and spins his head. Check out the short video below:

I’m extremely happy with the results. The files for this droid were top notch! I’ve learned a few things from this assembly… like patience, time and money are required… In January I plan on starting my full size droid. We shall see how long that takes. And whether my wife’s patience wears thin.

Halloween 2020

For obvious reasons- this year was a very subdued Halloween. We gave out candy to three groups of children for a grand total of eight kids. Our teenagers went up and down our cul-de-sac to hunt out some candy. Even though we had no real plans- my family still dressed up.

Considering how few homes they stopped at- they end up with a good haul and shared the candy amongst one another. Hooray for sugar!

For the notable costumes- Random did a mash up of Jack Skellington and Joaquin Phoenix’s Joker. Pretty good make up considering how she did it within a half an hour. Toying around with make up is one of her favorite things to do. Especially if it makes her look spooky.

For my costume- I did a fun take on Vincent Price from back when he showed up on The Muppet Show in the 70’s. Price is such an icon when it comes to classic horror. But I wasn’t sure how to portray him. I think it turned out doggone amazing.

I enjoyed my evening of viewing people’s costumes on Instagram all night. Some were very creative. As well, many people had small children who looked really cute.

How was your Halloween? Were you dressed up? Or did you just pig out on candy?

Festive Food for All Hallow’s Eve

Everyone thinks of pumpkins and candy when it comes to Halloween. And while I enjoy both, it’s also fun to make regular meals with a spooky twist.

Last night I made meatloaf and potatoes. But with a twist.

The meatloaf was a couple of severed hands. I used onions as the finger nails. It didn’t take much longer to make than it would regular meatloaf. I only wish I had sliced mozzarella to put on top as a “skin”.

As a side dish I made “shrunk head” baked potatoes. Again, really easy and didn’t take too much longer to create. But the final result was a fun dinner that was outstandingly flavorful.

Do you have any Halloween dinners? Perhaps cute mummy hot dogs? or ghostly concoctions.

Let me know in the comments.