Rug Doctor

We live in a home that has very little carpet. In fact it’s only in our hallway and theater room. The rest of our home has tile or laminate hardwood flooring with a few throw rugs. I like not having carpet because it helps with my allergies. Sort of. Except we have a dog that sheds. He sheds a lot.

His shedding requires us to vacuum every few days otherwise there are tiny dogs everywhere in our home. Dog hair gets on all of our clothes as well.

The small amount of carpet we do have is rather, um, disgusting. No amount of vacuuming will get the dog hair out. Plus our once white carpet has turned beige with tons of spots everywhere. This is due to the kids growing up and spilling stuff everywhere. It may be time to steam clean it. It’s been probably a decade since the last time I tried to deep clean it.

When I was younger, my parents would rent a Rug Doctor every six months or so. They would spend an entire day on a long weekend cleaning our entire home. Being at home for this weekend of cleaning was stressful as well. Furniture would be moved around to one side of the room or kitchen in order to really clean the floors. No matter what they did though, the carpet would remain wet for three days after. Which was really gross because walking around your home in wet socks for a couple of days is unpleasant.

Eventually my parents bought a cheap steam cleaner that they had for years. It was okay at cleaning, but I’m pretty sure a professional would have been better. I don’t want to own a carpet cleaner since I would rather just get rid of our carpet all together.

I’m not sure when I will clean our carpets, if ever, but I’m pretty sure I’ll be renting a Rug Doctor and do it myself. Even if I have to go over the carpet a few times. I’m kind of cheap that way.

Laundry

There are few things in this world that are mandatory to do. Laundry is high up on this list. I enjoy wearing clean clothes. Just not the work that goes into it.

My wife is the laundry washing expert in our household. I know how to do laundry, but I rarely do it though. My wife has a set schedule of what gets washed and when. It is everyone else’s responsibility to fold and put away their clothes afterwards. Personally, I had a jam packed full laundry hamper to sort out today. When I dumped it on the bed- it looked like one of those cubes of trash Wall-E spits out. Not very appealing.

After dumping it out, I had to fluff it up in order to match up my socks and get my shirts ready to fold. This took up most of our king sized bed. Once I saw the amount, all I wanted to do was say, “Screw it- I’m taking a nap.” But today I powered through it- I folded and put away my clean clothes like a good boy.

Clean laundry is a systematic occurrence. Like a sunrise. It just happens. And I appreciate that it appears on a regular basis. I just don’t always want to deal with it.

Freezer Food

I really don’t like having a freezer in our kitchen fridge. It becomes this frozen wasteland of food left to die a miserable death. The worst food that ends up in there?

Freezer Bananas.

Our plantation of uneaten brown bananas are being “saved” in order to make banana bread at a “later date”. When is that day you may ask? Later. Time to pack them back up, this time not just shoved into the freezer.

I pulled all of the food product items out and gave our freezer a wipe down. We had about a dozen unlabeled containers of soups, sauces, fruit(I think it’s fruit…), and freezer burnt meats. Time to figure out what to keep.

Ice Cubes- Zero

Ice crystals surrounding meat- at least a pound.

I found some chicken patties and an orange sliced in half squished at the back of the freezer. I don’t remember the last time we bought either of those items. Off to the food waste bin they go.

I re-organized the freezer with foods that we will use before Christmas. This should help over the next month or so. I still need to make ice cubes though. Or not. I don’t have any room for the trays at the moment.

But at least the bananas won’t fall and hit my toes like a brick any more.

Shitty Day

Today is the shittiest day of my vacation.

Literal shit.

After having the kids dig in our garden for the past few weeks in search of buried treasure, they found it. We just needed an extrusion afterwards to get it out.

This was not like the adventures that The Goonies had. My kids were digging to find our septic tank opening.

They did. In fact they found both lids. What to do next…

Today was the day to pump it out. This is the first time in 11 years since we moved in. And at nearly 20 years since it was last done. The tank is apparently twice to three times the size needed for our home.

That’s a lot of poop.

We needed a big truck.

Bright and early this morning it arrived. The fellow vacuuming out the waste was super awesome and we talked about shit. Apparently we should be pumping out every couple of years.

Oops.

The smell was bad. Butt not as bad as I thought it would be. A bit less than steaming manure on a hot day. Not quite campsite outhouse.

Now that it’s empty, I’m happy that this is done. Onto the rest of my day.

It really can’t be as shitty as the start.

Yard Work is Hard Work

We have had the luxury of some really nice weather to start off May. Of course this means getting back into the yard work. Hooray!?

Today I finally mowed the back lawn. The grass was a few inches tall and kept stopping my mower. Even worse were the surprise dog poop land mines hidden all around our acre. So that was kind of gross at times. Especially when I got a rather fresh mound.

I also took the blower to the roof and driveway to clear off the pine needles. I ended up filling seven yard waste cans with everything that I accumulated. At least that goes with the green waste.

Before dinner, two of my kids helped to get the back patio furniture cleaned and set up. Unfortunately the chairs are wet and we won’t be using them this evening after I finish BBQing. Tomorrow we will enjoy our meals outside undercover.

After hours and hours of hard work, I needed a cool down. So I took a shower and cracked open a Smirnoff ICE Berry Blast. As you can see by the can- it tastes like the popsicle of the same colours. A nice treat to end my day. More work ahead of me tomorrow with the other deck and wiping the roof trim and windows.

I love taking pride in my little castle.

Master of The House

I’m still on vacation for a few more days, so I decided to start a cleaning of the house. A man’s castle is his home.

It feels like I’ve played this game before. Spring is harsh though. The sunshine is showing off all the dust and soap scum that has built up. Time for the deep clean! The bleach is out, the windex is half gone and the chandeliers went through the dishwasher. Things are getting sparkly and shiny again.

It’s been a long day. Time for me to head out and have a couple drinks with a friend to unwind. Master of the house doling out the charm…

Forgotten Decoration

It was bound to happen, as it does every year… A lone Christmas Decoration was found six weeks later…

This time around it was much a larger piece than just an ornament or a bell. It was a serving platter. Forgotten on the piano behind some sheet music. Which is forgivable, because at least my children were still playing music. Unfortunately, they don’t tend to put the sheet music away until it is falling off the piano. My wife discovered the tray when she was cleaning around the piano this weekend.

And so ends the removal of our last decoration. It’s a sign that Spring is on its way. Hopefully the ice and snow take the hint and pack up soon for the season as well.

Cleaning, Cleaning and MORE CLEANING

Cleaning never ends.  Bedrooms, bathrooms, kitchen, living room- always seem to need a tidying up regularly.  It’s difficult to keep a home clean, especially with people living in it.


I’m going to outright state it- I’m probably the neatest person in our home.  And I’m no Mr. Clean.  But I do my best to put everything away in >>what I feel<< is the proper place.  There have been many discussions about where stuff belongs…  

My biggest issue in our home is dog hair.  The second is all the little bits of trash that float around that everyone wants to keep.  My family has saved such junk as an old clothing tag with an image of Hello Kitty to a crumpled plastic bag from the Lego Store.    Business cards to receipts to old envelopes also adorn our counters and shelves.  I go through and purge what I feel is junk on a regular basis.  Again, this has brought on some heated discussions between my wife and I.

Another broken ornament?


Now there is a Christmas explosion in our home.  Glitter and pine needles are the bane of my existence this time of year.  I swear we are vacuuming every other day now.  As well, there is nothing worse than a broken glass ornament.  Those things are so Fra-GEE-Lay that sometimes just pulling them out of the box causes them to shatter.

Creepy Santa…

But all of the cleaning and hard work is made easier this time of year.  For some reason our children are really really helpful- as if someone were watching them.

Too bad it wasn’t like this the rest of the year.