speech

Illeism

Posted on by Josef Havelka

Talking about yourself in third person is often looked at as being narcissistic. I suppose it is in a way. Especially if you do it in regular conversations. But it also helps to take yourself out of a situation and re-evaluate what happened. Let me explain…

Have you ever been at work and kind of lose concentration on the task at hand and make a mistake? If you’re like me, you say your own name and something derogatory. “Josef, you’re such an idiot!” Of course it’s not the most pleasant way to talk to yourself. But it somehow feels as though you took the onus off of yourself and put it on someone else. A way to blame the “other” you.

I’ve always wondered why we put ourselves down when making mistakes. Mistakes are a way of learning- a chance to always improve. Perhaps the people who say their name in the third person aren’t being conceited, but rather trying to correct their behavior by remaining positive about who they are.

Most of us don’t speak in the third person on a regular basis. It’s kind of weird. But the next time you catch yourself berating yourself when a mistake is made- try saying something positive with your name in the sentence. You’d be surprised how the encouragement from within can change your entire outlook. Elmo has been teaching it for four decades now.

What Do You Say?

Posted on by Josef Havelka

My daughter asked me a unique question the other day that I was unable to answer her immediately. She asked, “If you could give a motivational speech, what would you say?” This question was heavier than I expected. I had to think this one over.

Naturally I told her that I’d let her know. But she had me thinking about it all night. At least my daughter told me that I was inspiring with the majority of my blog posts. Hopefully she’s been reading my blogs! She’s also extremely intelligent and has a knack of reading people… just like her father.

Yes, she played me.

My daughter knew that in order to win me over she needed to “show” that she reads my blogs. Of course I do my best to be inspirational with what I write. Sometimes I write about my children and their achievements. Because their success is my success. I also love to write about the beauty in the world, even when it’s really tough to see it.

Even in my positivity, I have a dark side to my humor. I love to let it out and surprise people with my crudeness. Last night was no exception.

Our family sat around and played Cards Against Humanity. One of my favorite games for all the right reasons. It’s rude, vulgar, and downright funny to see our teenagers try and out do each other in the punchlines. Or try and play disturbing cards to gross each other out.

Like I mentioned though, I am good at playing people. I play the cards that I know will win based on each of their sense of humor. The first round was an easy win for me. The second round, the family started to use my technique against me. But it was more fun to see them strategize on who played what cards.

CAH over the years.

Cards Against Humanity has been humoring me for years now. We’ve seen it at conventions and I’ve bought into special edition cards that support a sort of anarchy. I’ve even shared the game with others and gotten them hooked on it. Evil, pure evil.

My motivational speech? It would have to be titled, “Play to the gallery.” Where every time I had to give a speech, I’d tell people what they want to hear.