Bad Blood

Sometimes hostility remains even after you have “Buried The Hatchet”. I don’t tend to keep in contact with people who piss me off.  And it takes a lot to get me to that point.

But I also know that I have lost many so called friends, or missed out on job opportunities, even dating when I was younger because of someone’s influence on the lady person I liked.  Opinions matter to nearly everyone in the known universe.  Opinions about oneself, each other, current events- you name it, people have an opinion.  And it sucks.

It sucks being a quality Grade “A” asshole.  It sucks being treated like you’re second class.  It sucks that not everyone shares the same opinion. It sucks that we feel things. It sucks that we can’t be emotionless drones. It sucks…

But it doesn’t suck.  It means we are weeding out those around us that aren’t of benefit.  There are people we need to lose contact with because they are jerks. Or perhaps because of the lack of their intellect makes them appear as jerks.  Maybe we lose a friend or two because they are taking something of value away from us.  Maybe it’s emotional, maybe it’s tangible- maybe it’s the air we breathe.  But losing people from our lives means they have run their course.  

Being courteous doesn’t mean I have to be nice.  People need to breathe and eat- you won’t see me choking the shit out of a dumbass, no matter how badly I want to.  I’m also 100% sure that I’ve been on the receiving end of that hate.  Come on, I have a younger sister- she’ll tell you how great of a big brother I was in the past. 

Stop caring what people think of you.  Start caring about what you think of o̶t̶h̶e̶r̶s̶ yourself. Just be the best you that you can be. Dammit I ranted.  

Here’s a picture of a rhododendron from my front yard.  It don’t give a shit what you think.  It’s pretty because it’s designed to be pretty. Not because someone told it to change.

Colorful language

I grew up in a household where every other word my father spoke was a cuss word.  For years I avoided swearing because I didn’t want to be like my father.  Of course I swore from time to time.  Then I started working at the railroad.  Now I use foul language in my everyday speech.

But only at work is it very prominent.  Everything is emphasized with the “EFF dash dash dash word” or some shit like that.  I do use the colorful language around my home and friends, but I genuinely try and express myself without it.  That is a challenge.  Especially when I meet new people or hit the convention circuit with my wife.  When I’m out there, I’m part of her business.  There is no need to add a cuss when trying to sell cute furry ears.

Personally, I’d like to make it a goal to lessen the harshness of my vocabulary at work.  But that’s going to be the challenge.  Replacing words with fudge, frak, shucks,shoelace, dangit, golly gee, etc… won’t have the same impact, but I think it will add a lightness to the work environment.  As stressful as my job is, I enjoy it and enjoy the people I work with. I’d like to keep the respect and think maybe my language needs to show that.