wife

Bed and Breakfast… At Home

Posted on by Josef Havelka

Long weekend. People traveling out of town. Beautiful weather, why not? So last night I told my wife I booked a last minute Bed And Breakfast for Friday night. She was upset at first, then was trying to guess where we were going. I let her believe that she guessed correctly.

So we hit the road after her work day. We needed to stop and get gas. That was when our middle child called to say that our hot water tank was leaking. Oh no- time to turn around and check it out. Our 19 year old did a good job falsifying the urgency in the phone call.

When we arrived home, my wife ran to the basement to check the tank. Then she was confused and getting frustrated with the kids for standing there not saying anything. So I walked my wife out to the en-suite kitchen where she finally realized that we weren’t going anywhere. It would just be the two of us having an evening out of our regular life and chilling.

Had I not “tricked” my wife, she would have still been doing things around the house. Even if I asked for a couple of hours of downtime- she would have found numerous things to do. Instead, having her pack an overnight bag and think that everything was on pause at home, worked really well. We floated in the pool, at some of my wife’s favorite snacks at the cabana, listened to music and then played some old Nintendo video games until bed.

This morning, I had a small breakfast ready for us to sit on the back deck and enjoy nature. Following breakfast was a nice 5km walk around the trails nearby followed by a water break. I placed labels on our water bottles that say “Love Always” which is something my wife signs on every card we give out to the kids and each other.

For a mini staycation, I think I did pretty good at giving my wife a break. Perhaps we will do a few more of these “getaways” this summer.

Mother’s Day Robotization

Posted on by Josef Havelka

I’m probably biased, but I think my wife is the best mother around. She has been a hard working and loving mother since 2002. The three kids who call her “mom” have been lucky to have her around.

From supporting our kids by cheering them on through their various activities; to consoling them when they need some extra love; Lee-Anne has been a wonderful parent.

I know that periodically my wife feels like she is just going through the motions. Oftentimes everything she does is for someone else’s benefit. But those are the sacrifices she gives in order to keep our children happy.

I’m glad to be her partner in all of this. She has been inspiration for me and my parenting style. Together we have conquered the world! Or at least attempted to pick the battles that matter most when raising kids. As difficult as parenting can be, Lee-Anne has overcome the obstacles and become a fantastic mom.

Happy Mother’s Day to all of the other mothers out there as well! Enjoy the day designed for you!

Bring Me

Posted on by Josef Havelka

My wife and I have been going for walks whenever we can. Actually she goes for walks and I tag along. There’s kind of this ritual we do beforehand though.

Every time she wants to go for a walk, she will ask me if I would like to join her. Admittedly there are many days I will say no. But she will ask again before she heads out. If I said no earlier- this is when I reconsider and end up joining her.

Hanging out with my wife brings me joy. If a walk is the only time we can have together, then I will take advantage of those moments whenever possible. We both have busy schedules, but making the time for each other has always been important for our relationship.

It’s also allowed us to have in-depth conversations that we would otherwise avoid. Topics like kids, finances, travel, etc get talked about more freely and without hesitation. Walking means we aren’t sitting on the couch or at a table hoping to be distracted by a screen. Instead we can see the beauty in the world and breathe in the fresh air, thus keeping our minds at ease. Far better for our mental health.

Every time my wife goes for a walk, I hope she brings me. I secretly like them even if I say no at first.

Series of Dates

Posted on by Josef Havelka

My wife and I had a series of dates this week. It was nice to hang out and talk. We really needed some time together that wasn’t doing some regular monotonous routine. We even decided to have another date today just so the good times wouldn’t end.

We went for a quick brunch date at “The Henry” in our neighborhood. Granted it was a cheap breakfast, but still- it got us out of the house again. Right got after our meal, we headed to the car and got caught in a fierce rain storm. It’s been a while since we laughed and ran in the rain.

I’ve really enjoyed the time spent with my wife this week. Our lives seem so busy otherwise. Like most folks, our free time ends up being exhausted on the couch with the television on and our cellphones in our hands- zoning out. Reconnecting with each other has been a great feeling. Hopefully we can keep on dating. I kind of like this lady.

Couple Of Date Nights

Posted on by Josef Havelka

Last night my wife and I went out for a quiet dinner date. The pub was in the neighborhood where we first owned a home. So naturally we drove past our first house. That was neat to look back at where we started.

We ate some tasty pub food and talked about life. It was a nice break. Afterwards we drove to Michael’s and checked out crafts and yarn before heading home.

Tonight we dropped our son off at his speed skating practice and headed out to a place called “Industry Arcade”. There we paid for an hour of free play and got our fill of pinball games! We also did a bit of competitive game play on a few classic arcade games. I’m still pretty good at Frogger while my wife was better at Donkey Kong.

To finish our evening off, we grabbed a couple of lattes and watched the end of our son’s practice. I have enjoyed our rekindled fun times over the last couple of days. I think we may go to play more arcade games again in the future as it made us feel youthful again. Perhaps we were longing for the years past when arcades were a thing. Both of us have different memories of arcades, but similar in many aspects.

It doesn’t matter how old we get- my wife and I enjoy being juvenile.

Date Nights

Posted on by Josef Havelka

Since I had to work last night for Valentine’s Day- my wife and I are headed out for a date tonight instead. Then tomorrow we are going on another date. Followed by Friday evening building a Lego set together. I’m looking forward to each one.

Tonight we are going to hit up some pub style burgers and have an evening together. We are rekindling our youthful follies over the next few dates. It will be nice to just spend time together just the two of us.

We have been on different wavelengths and schedules lately. It feels as though we are just ships passing in the night. A few moments here and there, nothing meaningful. These next few nights will be fun.

I’m glad my wife said she will still be mine. Even after all of these years.

First Rug Completed

Posted on by Josef Havelka

After a couple of weeks, my first rug was completed yesterday.

Now, it doesn’t take a couple of weeks to make a 16”x30” rug. But in that time I had to buy yarn, build a frame, order a power supply, figure out how to get an image projected from my iPhone, draw the image, tuft, glue, cut out, shave, shave some more, trim, shave again… in the end, the work required to do this rug took me about three to four hours.

A solid start. I learned what I need to do to be better. I also got a feel for the gun and the materials used. I’m hoping that my next few rugs will take about three to four hours but would have more details involved. The next rug I make is for me.

After a slow start on the rug My New Hobby turned out pretty good. I made it for my wife: Lee-Anne. She loves “L” from the anime “Death Note” and this was his symbol. Fitting since it’s the first letter of her name as well. Maybe after I make a few more rugs I will retry this one to perfect it. I know all the flaws I created and it will bother me for ages. But still, a solid first rug.

Day One of a New Hobby

Posted on by Josef Havelka

Today I finally saw some progress in My New Hobby- Tufting. After getting My Little Corner ready the other day, I have been frothing at the mouth to try making my first rug.

It started with a design. I wanted to try something elegant and easy. I chose “L“ for my wife. Besides it being the letter of her first name, it’s also from one of her favorite anime shows- “Death Note”. I took the image, reversed it, shone it from my projector onto the back of the fabric- where I traced it out with a sharpie.

Then came the fun part! Using the tufting gun. It was a neat process and once I got going, my confidence grew. I started with the outline of the letter, then filled it in.

It wasn’t necessary to keep the lines or yarn touching as it filled out pretty good. My wife gave a couple of tries as well. I think she may want to tuft in the future as it is a very satisfying sound and feeling.

The way the yarn comes out thick a full makes me happy. The rug is already feeling very soft and looking pretty. Obviously I hope to see some progress and get better at it.

After a couple of hours, I had made quite the mess and used two full things of yarn. I had to call it quits since it was getting late and I have work in the morning. There’s still a few more steps to go in the process before I can say I have made a rug. Like gluing the back to prevent the yarn from being pulled out. Or trimming the front so that everything is smooth and even looking. The final step is giving it to my wife to have.

Stay tuned for an update by the weekend on the final results.

Boxing Day With My Sweetheart

Posted on by Josef Havelka

Post Christmas Day in Canada is Boxing Day. My wife and I opted to not do any shopping this year. We are going out later in the week, but not for any big sales. Just a few essentials for the home.

Instead of shopping- my wife and I are having a day of just the two of us. Our kids are doing their own thing- watching tv and playing video games, so it seemed like the perfect opportunity to have some quality time together. We put our phones into their new matching cases and headed out into the world.

We went for a Five Kilometer walk in our neighborhood. Most of the snow is gone now and the temperature was almost in the double digits at 9°C. A lovely afternoon together getting some fresh air.

For the balance of the afternoon, we are going to eat some leftovers for a late lunch followed by some video games together. My wife has requested that we play a classic for our family- Skylanders Giants. We are going to start the story from the beginning on our Wii-U.

Chances are we will play pretty steady for the next few days. I’m excited to re-play this game series as it was a ton of fun ten years ago! Let’s see if it holds up.

I hope you are all enjoying your holidays and time with family.

Do You Remember?

Posted on by Josef Havelka

Do you remember? The 21st night of September?

My wife loves that song. Her friends often look forward to singing it to her every year. I find it humorous and have written about it in the past: 21st Night of September . Today got me thinking about my wife and how she remembers the way I like things done. Specifically preparing food.

Now, I’m not saying that the way I like my food prepared is right, but it is how I like my food. It used to cause many discussions years ago, but now my wife just goes with it. Usually.

I’m a big texture and taste person when it comes to food. I don’t overly care if different food touches on a plate, so that’s not it. It’s more how the flavors mix. For example- when making a sandwich- the mustard side needs to be the side the meat is on, not the cheese. Cheese on mustard has a very different taste and texture compared to meat and mustard. Trust me.

Mr Noodles… the instructions on the packet are wrong. The noodles need to be placed in the water immediately and then brought to a boil. Once the noodles are soft, drain all the water. Then put the noodles in a bowl and add the flavor packet. This isn’t a soup we are making! It’s called Mr. Noodles not Mr. Soup.

Because of these preferences, I will admit that I am the one who usually ends up making the lunches. My wife will adhere to my choices when making something for me, which is nice, and has on occasion agreed with how I make foods. Like a dash of salt after goulash is served. It brings out the flavor immensely as you are about to eat.

However it’s not just food preferences I need to work on with her. I still need to get her to understand that the toilet paper flap goes over the roll, not behind it.

And with that, I am off to escape to work to avoid confrontation once she reads my blog.

Love you honey!

First Day(s) Of School/Work September 2022

Posted on by Josef Havelka

Today was the first day of school for our youngest at age 16. He was returning to his high school for grade 11. He stayed at a friends house last night because today was only an hour or so long and more just a chance for everyone to meet up again.

Our middle attended their first day of post-secondary at the Simon Fraser University. Upon arrival, it to was a meet and greet type of day, but lasted about six hours or so. They had a chance to make some new friends, create group chats, and even went to the mall with these new friends after the first day ended.

My wife also began a new job today for a company called Jane. She is working remotely (from home) in a similar manner as she once did for Shopify. Her day went rather quickly.

But all three of them had great experiences on the first day of their new adventures. I was genuinely excited to hear about their first day encounters over dinner. I’m glad our middle made some new friends already and is really enthusiastic about the school. I was a bit worried prior to this moment. But I think my fears and anxiety trumped theirs. I’m also really proud of my wife for jumping into a new role after such an unexpected leave from her previous job. I know it wasn’t easy for her to go an apply for work when she didn’t foresee that moment coming. But she is back in the saddle again and moving forward with her career! Our son was just happy to be back with his high school buddies and his change in fine arts major is a chance for him to showcase other skills he has.

All in all a good first day was had in our household. How was your first day?

Seeing It From A Different Perspective

Posted on by Josef Havelka

I’m always sharing pictures of sunsets and views from our vantage point. I love the colours that nature produces and the way the sky is always vibrant and ever changing.

Today, we had a late dinner and sat inside instead of on our deck; like we usually do in the summer. When eating at the dining room table- normally I face the glass door that looks outside. Tonight I sat opposite of my normal chair. I was missing out on the sunset, but the world was shining into our home and brought with it similar hues.

As beautiful as the sun shining into our home was, my wife and I had a difference of opinion on what the colour actually was. I said it was orange, my wife said the colour shining in was purple. Our son said it was light brown. Now I’m leaving it up to my friends and readers- what colour do you see shining against our grey walls?

Honestly, I’m at a loss. I am adamant that it’s orange. But I could very well be wrong.

Weekend At Home With My Wife

Posted on by Josef Havelka

This weekend our two teenagers went off to Vancouver to attend Anirevo (an anime convention). So my wife and I had the place to ourselves.

And we goofed off.

We played in the pool for hours- splashing and laughing with a few drinks inside of us. We lounged in the gazebo (which we have now dubbed “The Cabana”) and had some fantastic dinners together. It was like having our own private oasis on vacation together. These past couple of days has us realizing that becoming “Empty Nesters” won’t be so bad.

I’m really happy that my wife and I can do these things together. It feels as though we didn’t really have much time to date before we jumped into parenthood 20 years ago. So we are making up for it now.

Life is pretty good these days.

Staycation So Far- Soooooo Good!

Posted on by Josef Havelka

I have been throughly enjoying this past week of staycationing at home. For a couple of the days I built a Deck for my wife’s garden. The two of us have also gone for a couple of walks together. We did a bit of shopping, we have made some amazing dinners and I have been doing breakfast meals better than ever. All with the company of the one I love.

But the majority of this staycation has had us poolside. We have done nothing but relax, swim, read, listen to music, enjoy the breeze, and appreciate what we have. If it weren’t for having to make our own meals and clean up after- you’d think we were staying at a private oasis resort. But this is exactly what where we wanted to get to in life- appreciating our home and each other’s company.

As much as I am looking forward to our next “get away” I can’t help but be upset about leaving our home to do it. Especially in the summer. My days off from work will have me poolside whenever the weather permits. But until then- time to get back to enjoying this staycation!

Cheers everybody! Catch me by the water for the next few days if you want to hang out!

Staycationing Time 2022

Posted on by Josef Havelka

I finished my last day of work before my first summer vacation. I am onto 11 days of freedom. Freedom to just enjoy time with my wife doing nothing but enjoying life.

Of course it’s not really going to be a vacation of nothingness. We will be in the backyard floating in the pool most of the time. Other days will be early morning kayaking. I have a feeling we will be out exploring more of Cloverdale and Surrey than we did last year- perhaps to find some farmers markets and such.

But nothing is planned per se. No weekend getaway. No booked travels. Just whatever we decide to do will be planned the day before. I’m not used to having no plans. This may be a first for me.

I hope I can keep up.

Twenty One

Posted on by Josef Havelka

My wife and I are celebrating our 21st Anniversary today. And in true fashion- it is a hot day just like it was on our wedding day. So we are spending it poolside in our own little oasis.

We have come a long way together. The lifestyle we have created is the sort of thing that dreams are made of. I’m lucky and glad that we met all those years ago and how quickly things moved. I couldn’t imagine a life with anyone else and I’m really happy that we hit the road running.

I’m looking forward to our next set of adventures as we continue to grow and love one another.

Happy Anniversary Honey! I love you with all my heart.

Change In Weather Attitudes

Posted on by Josef Havelka

I mentioned previously about wind storms and the havoc it once reigned on our lives. The chaos that the wind would cause. The destruction and mess that it would leave behind for us to clear up. And the fear that a branch or tree would come crashing down.

Today was another windstorm. And as it continues, I am glad to have moved from our previous house. My wife is also getting over those bouts of weather induced anxiety. She was even able to joke about it earlier.

I’m glad she was able to find humor finally after decades of calamity and fear. It also seems that this windstorm is doing its best to get rid of the cold weather we have had these past few weeks and months.

As of late, I have been wanting warmer weather to approach. This weekend, I may get my wish to come true. We are expecting some sun and higher temperatures that we have yet to feel this season. I look forward to lounging in the backyard and having fun doing so.

As a man, I want to get everything done so I can have nothing left to do. I just want to do nothing in the sun. Just experience it. The warmth on my face, the red hue behind my closed eyelids, and the sensation of the world being at rest and comforting.

First Dip In The Pool

Posted on by Josef Havelka

The sun peaked out this afternoon long enough for us to enjoy it. It was sent hot, but in the sun it was warm! A couple of weeks ago we had taken the cover Off OurPool in hopes to jumpstart the summer. No such luck.

Yesterday, the weather report was not looking promising for the near future. But I was hopeful. So today, when my wife finished work, we jumped into the pool. We both agreed that we were going in- rain or shine.

Lee-Anne went in first. The sun was out and the atmosphere was pleasantly warm. I had turned on the heater for the pool yesterday- and it was a comfortable 24°C already.

We had kind of forgotten to let the kids know that we were going into the pool. So when our middle came home from school- they ended up hanging out in the yard while my wife and I swam. I felt like Darwin was the adult in the situation- making sure that two doofuses didn’t drink too much and get hurt.

I’m definitely looking forward to enjoyment of the pool throughout the summer. I’m already feeling the energy burn from splashing around. Swimming has always been a good workout that leads to a great sleep. Hopefully we can have friends over soon to enjoy the fun and relaxation poolside. It would be nice if the entire weather forecast could change for the better!

Real Quebec Photos From My Wife And Son

Posted on by Josef Havelka

Yesterday I mentioned how my wife was sending ridiculous pictures to me while on her trip. Shortly after writing that blog, she sent me some much nicer and more touristy style of pictures. Here is a quick collection of images from my wife and son:

Architecturally, Quebec is Eastern European influenced. The entire place reminds me of a real life fantasy world smack dab in the middle of Canada. And people just going about their business, because living like this is totally normal.

I do wish I was there with them. Maybe one day I will go on a trip and see what Quebec has to offer. For now, I just get to enjoy a few photo dumps from their trip!

Quebec Has My Wife And Son

Posted on by Josef Havelka

My wife and son have arrived safely in Quebec. They have a couple of days to explore before the speed skating competition. So that’s what they did.

Throughout the day my wife sent me random photos. None were really the type that people share while on a vacation or trip. More just things that she found interesting or humorous- and sent them to send me.

I am a little unsure as to why she shared a picture of kale dumped on the side of the road. Or why she felt it necessary to send a picture of snow the height of a car. In fact, when she sent that to me, as I am here in Vancouver, it began to snow shortly after I received the text. We can all blame her for the snow arriving here! Sorry friends on behalf of my wife.

However, amongst the random pictures of things, she did send me a smiling selfie of the two of them. There was also the obligatory poutine meal picture. So I know they are happy and well fed on this trip. Hopefully she will share some other pictures of more interesting adventures and I can pass them on to everyone else.

Capped

Posted on by Josef Havelka

I have a very large bottle cap collection that I started back in 1998 or so. I’m somewhere in the 100,000 range of various pop and beer caps. I don’t have a plan for them at this time, so in boxes they sit.

I do have one cap that isn’t a normal bottle cap. It means a great deal to me and I keep it aside with many of my other mementos. I don’t think my wife even knows that I have it. She gave it to me one day while we were dating, and I kept it ever since.

This is from an old Snapple bottle back in the year 2000. When I first met my wife, she had this bottle cap. It was an image she really liked. Within weeks of meeting my wife, she got it tattooed on the back of her neck. She gave me the cap to keep.

It’s the sort of tattoo that only a few select people have seen or know about. Her long, curly hair hides it. I see it all the time and have accepted it as a part of who she is. I can’t tell you why she liked this image or why she chose to get it as a tattoo. But she did.

Keeping the cap is significant to me. It is a small token of our growth in our relationship. The uniqueness that makes us each who we are and where we once were. I still remember how excited my wife was at the time when she got the tattoo done.

Do you have something like this that you have kept over the years? A piece of your past (or someone else’s) that you won’t ever part with? Let me know in the comments. I’d love to hear your stories.

How I Scored My Wife

Posted on by Josef Havelka

Sometimes I will call my wife for no other reason than to tell her “I love you.”

And that’s it.

Nothing else gets discussed or said. I just say those three words and sometimes hang up. Other times I’ll wait for her response.

I do this because of when I first met her. We had met while hanging out with mutual friends at a club. We had a late night after as we all had Denny’s coffee and laughs. I drove her home and she stole my jacket. But she gave me her phone number. A few days after we met, I called her up and asked only one question of her-

“Can I call you later?”

She said “um, okay” in a confused manner and I saint “thanks” and hung up.

I called her a few hours later and we arranged for our first date. I had intrigued her enough that we ended up being inseparable since the year 2000. My antics of affection- like calling her randomly- continue to keep our love alive.

A week after Valentines Day and I also think about what we do for one another. From the little things, like when we travel- who gets what side of the bed and why. To the big things- like a new car must have special decals added to the windows. We are a great pair and I am happy. Even if my phone call lasts less than 10 seconds.

Winter Walk By The Water

Posted on by Josef Havelka

The other day my wife and I went for an afternoon walk by the beach. On our walk we talked about our first year together and how we went down that way only a few times. We now live only about a 20 minute drive away from White Rock, so heading there may be happening more often this summer.

When we first arrived, we took some happy selfies with the ocean and clouds as a backdrop. We were probably the least bundled up people as many who we passed had scarves, toques and gloves on. But at 8°C it wasn’t that cold.

Even though it was grey and a bit cool, my wife and I were wearing our rose colored glasses we had bought for her Birthday Trip to Mexico. The warmth of the view from the sunglasses made it easier to enjoy our date. We walked along the shore, up the pier and enjoyed the promenade. We headed back along Marine Drive and talked about coming back to enjoy a restaurant or two in the future.

It was a good few hours of casual strolling just holding hands and talking. As we get older, we both just want to enjoy one another’s company more. Keeping the emotional connection between us going and creating memories along the way.

Still Having Date Nights

Posted on by Josef Havelka

My wife and I have been together for nearly 22 years. I still love her dearly. One of our biggest strengths is that we communicate with one another. It’s not always easy to talk about concerns or tough days, but we do our best. My favorite thing is that we can still have fun together.

We still attend our favorite sushi place regularly- Nikko Sushi. They treat us like family and we always have a great meal there. I enjoy being silly with my wife and we continue to make each other smile and laugh.

She drags me out for walks around the neighborhood still. I have realized that even though I may not want to go, it is good for the mental health. As well, I know it makes her happy to go out and talk with me while we wander. I have been considering our walks as “dates” these days. It gets me out more often to spend quality time with her.

We also have “dates” where the two of us play video games together. Somehow after two decades, we still act young and silly… And I love it. We will continue to have dates for years to come. Perhaps one day we will be an elderly couple talking smack talk at one another while playing some VR with teenage looking avatars.

Snow Joe Blows

Posted on by Josef Havelka

Overnight we had a healthy dumping of snow again. This time, my wife was ready for it. And she was excited too. Not like her considering how she prefers warmer temperatures.

Two days ago- a small electric snow blower was delivered from Amazon. My wife was so excited about it that she didn’t let me get any unboxing photos. She also assembled it herself with great glee while I was at work. I think she bought it because it was called a “Snow Joe”.

Again, she was so excited to use it that she asked me to call her when I was off work at 6am. That way she could clear the driveway before I got home. The foot of snow was gone for my car to back into the driveway. She demonstrated how amazing the “Snow Joe” was and I quickly finished the rest of the driveway before the neighbors were even awake. That’s right, I finished after my wife was satisfied with herself.

For the amount of pleasure this blower brought my wife, and the ease at which we cleared the driveway, I’m surprised we hadn’t bought one sooner. Although in our last home, the trees helped keep our driveway clear. (I’m pretty sure all those pine needles and small branches would’ve damaged this machine.)

I also think the neighbors are a bit jealous now at how quickly our property cleans up. Sweating with a snow shovel is no more! Do you use a shovel, snow blower, or private company to do the dirty work? Let me know in the comments.